well what will I whine about today

Gaul! the last few days have been hell.

I am having pain were I have never had pain before.  Am I doing too much or is it just the weather?  who knows as of now.  I think things are just picking up a speed here.

The last couple of days i have had a sore throat.  Figured okay here comes another cold.  But it did not erupted into one  Instead My throat is still reaaly sore and now my tounge is starting to join the act.  Along with it hurting into my ear area.  Maybe I am having trouble with one of my glands.  Great.  I was just to the doc and now have to go back because of this.  My tounge feels like it is being bitten all the time and swallowing is just the pits.   Food just doesn't want to be swollowed without scratching all the way down.  So now what is it  I don't know.  I had it before but it went away after a couple of days.  This time it seems to be hanging around a little longer.  There might be a little swelling there on the right side of my neck as well.

Sleeping the past few nights has been a challenge as well.  Tiose and turn, toss and turn.  I think I run a marathon every night just rolling back and forth.  trying to get confortable.  I many times through the night hit my hubby sometime or rather.  He isn't liking it very much either.  It means niether of us is getting any sleep.  I just get to were it is okay and then another part of me starts to hurt.

I went out to the garage yesterday and started working on a cane for my self.  I do a little woodworking to keep me busy.  I love the smell of sawdust.  But my nostrils don't.  They start to plug up when I am out there.  But it is fun to make something out of a piece of wood.  My lastest hobbie. Well anyways.  the cane will beput to good use if I keep walking the way I do.  Instead of making a straight line course to some direction.  I end up kinda zigzagging it to were I want to go.  It takes a dame long time to get someplace.  Then when i want to walk around a corner I seem to make wide turns.  It is very frustrating to not be able to do something that you could do before with such ease.

I don't have any trouble making it up stairs.  Just a little slower but can still manage them with out much pain.  There is the awed day that i might now want to get up off the ciouch but I still push myself to do that.

I still think that being on disability in the future is what will happen to me.  Some days I am real good and no trouble at all and others i just want to chuck it all an sit down for the day.  But the dogs still need waklked and the house work still needs done and I still have to go to work every day.  what will happen when i hit the time for disability?  I hope I can keep up and be active some were.  If I am not going to work  whet the heck do I do then.  I have to still be able to bring in money somewere to pay the bills.  I am in my 50's and have a llot of living left in me.  I don't want to fill up the house with aweds and ends of my wood working with out anyplace to get rid of it.  it just collects dust around here.  Oh anyone interested in seeing my woodworking I have another  blog called Morningsong creations.  Take a look if you wish.

Right now I am working on a cane for myself and a picture of some horses I hope to sell at the Farmers market I attend once in while.

Oh also this month I have joined a course.  It is the arthritis self help workshop.  Hopefully it will help me out a little.  All everyone says now is oh you have arthritis I guess get over with it and and live with it.  Well somedays that is eaasier said then done.  So now I go to the help group once a month and now I am taking this course.  They give you suggestions and such to cope with the pain.  Last week they made you set a goul for the week and try to keep it for the week.  My goul was to make it four times up a set of stairs out behind our place.  It is 3 flights up to the next level of roadway.  Yesterday I made it up one flight before I had to stop. today I did two flights and a little bit.  I have two more times to try this week with out Hubbie walking with me.  He pushes and I don't need the pushing.  It just wants to make me push back.  So just two more times to do this before I am walking with him again for a few days.  I can do the whole three flights I know I can.  I tried counting bacwards today which was one of the suggestions at the group and you know it worked to get me a little further then I usually do.  So that made me happy.

Well I guess enough whining for now.  Time to get on with my day.

well more GREAT news. NOT!!!!

Was to the doc the other day.

Well she said CT scan results back.  Four of my back bones are inflaired and my hip is inflaired.  Sounds scary.  Does that mean I will be getting worse and not being able to walk sooner or late? 

I can feel the pain all up and down my back.  Sometimes nights are just unbearable to sleep.  I feel the pain run from my lower back down my right leg and into my foot.  It got so bad last night I had to get up move around a little then take some more pain meds and lie down again.  Finally went to sleep about 2 o clock.  Lucky me.

Work yesterday was the pits as well.  I was standing there most of the day and all I could think about was how I could stand to keep my back from bothering me.  The customers didn't get my best foot forward yesterday.

Last night I went to the arthritis support group they have in Abbostford.  Left work a half hour early to make it on time.  They usually have some thing to bring my mind out of its minset of being in pain.  Had a guest speaker last night on arthritis  101.  Just gave a little back round on what may be going on and how to maybe cope with it.  Well somedays I just don't want to cope.  Just want to stay in bed and forget about the day.

Next week is the start of a self management seminar going on in Mission.  Hopefully it will do some good for me.  I'll let you know next week how the first session went.  Allot of people say it is good.

Last night the thing that was said is eating right and keep moving. Well I try that.  I do a walk each day with my dogs.  Try to do a little stretching and maybe a little weight,  but this thing called work seems to get in the way.  Along with looking after family and making meals and cleaning house and laundry.. Al  that fun stuff that takes up a day.  When is there time for me.  I know right now when I am on the internet saying I don't have enough time. HA!

Well another came across to me he that I found out on the internet.  Is there is a Canadian tax credit for disabilty.  I have a disabily, but am I that far along that I would be excepted for it.  It would be nice to be able to get more money back then spend out.  Also be able to get a credit for having to do renovations on house to make life easier for me.  I guess when I see doc in May I will have to ask her if I would be eligable.  I also want to get were I am off work too.  But I think that will be a year or two down the road yet befor ei will be able to get on disabilty and not have to endure work any more.  It would be nice if I could have a stool to lean on at work.  It would make it a little easier on  my back if I could. 

Well I guess that is wishful thinking that the company would think of an employee instead of the almighty dollar.

Not too much else to whine about today.  Work is going to be calling me here in a little while and I have to go to VW dealer to get a headlight changed.  More money to go out on that.  Great.